Reasons my asshole hates me!

Oh, internet. Tonight…. It was a night for the books. But before tonight…. It was the weekend. The weekend that my step daughter and my sister got to be in the same house!

So. I tried to be the cool mom. Sure, 9 year old. You can get online! But only where the 11 year old is so I can watch you both!

Do you KNOW how sneaky the 11 year olds can be? Im sure you do. But just in case you don’t, the answer… It is VERY. VERY VERY SNEAKY LITTLE ASSHOLE. It all looked well and good. Until I went into messages.

My 11 year old said THE MOST HATEFUL THING TO THE BABY! I honestly can’t even repeat it and its not even language its just…. Wtfuckery. Basically my kid was tryna be fuckin momo or something. Like. Dafuq?!

“Nooo it was just a joke nooooo you just dont get it NoOOOooo she was laughing! You just dont get the humor!”

Ha. Well I get that I can end the platform for your humor, kid.

So with that piece of backstory I bring you to tonight. I’m being told how AWFUL I am and how nobody is hurt by this “SMALL group of people with their own ideas and their own sense of humor it just doesnt hurt anyone I dont know WHY you dont GET that…”

So that terminology triggered a great teachable moment! I looked at her and said, “ya know who else was a small group of people with their own ideas? The kkk. And Im sure in the beginning they werent hurting anyone. It was just words and their own sense of humor. Words turn to actions turn to people dying because of one groups perception and it only takes ONE person to take it too far before you have an angry mob, or a LARGE group of people on the WRONG side of history!”

I mean… Reasonable link. Amiright? Like… These kids are suggesting DEATH to each other. As jokes. And already so many of them take it seriously… Look at the young suicide rates. But OH MY GAWD.

She has since SCREAMED at the top of her lungs about how I’m basically Hitler for comparing anonymous assholes to anonymous assholes (😂Im sorry, but my link REALLY worked. Idc how bad it sounded.) She has slammed doors, beaten herself with the remote(…why? Like really what fucking good… Ugh. Whatever) and cried herself dry of tears.

And now… In about 30 minutes Im calling lights out and turning everything off. If a snide remark made out of concern for this generation triggered a meltdown to rival Chernobyl…. I wonder what bedtime will bring tonight 😭😂

Send wine, y’all.

Yours truly

-one fed up fk up-


Are Your Kids Assholes, Too?

Do you remember growing up? Were we as bad as this generation?

I feel like the answer to that CAN’T be yes. I know I was a little f*ing jerk, y’know? Like, I don’t think I was perfect. But WHAT THE F**K DUDE!?

For reference. I have no children of my own. I am a sister, an aunt, and a kick ass step mom if I do so say myself, but I am not *Technically* a “parent”. Am just a parental unit, struggling to make my kid into less of an asshole.


I have never experienced anything as frustrating as having an 11 year old look me dead in the face and blatantly lie, and tell me no. And to go away. In a house that *I* busted ass to pay for…. And then welcomed that little ass in to… And then, the cherry on top, if you will… It’s definitely ALL my fault that said child will NEVER know happiness, because I dont let her “experiment” with random ass bathroom objects and my expensive hand soap at TWO A.M?!

You’re damn RIGHT I yelled! I am a HORRIBLE PERSON for being angry that my kid was out of bed 3 hours after lights out and I am a FAILURE of an adult for doling out consequences for ass acting actions.

I mean, no, Child. It’s not like you have multiple electronic devices you begged for, and “cool” clothes in a heap on my floor that haven’t moved AT ALL, or random ass social media accounts that I just gave in on. No, I’ve done NOTHING to see you happy, kid. You’re sure right.

If you, my dear reader, decided to peruse this bloggy blog because your kids ARE in fact assholes, like mine, don’t think I have advice. I don’t. I’m probably more lost than you are… But I needed a platform where I could just YELL AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS ABOUT WHY THE FUCK ARE THESE KIDS LIKE THIS?!?!

SO. If you would like to yell as well, share your asshole stories with me in the comments and make me feel less alone?

And tune in sporadically to see what fuckery ensues in our lovely little blended house if you so please.

Lots of love to you, and possibly lots of alcohol

Yours truly

-one fed up fk up-